Tuesday, 2 May 2017


Supposedly today I attend my graduation ceremony in University of Waikato, Hamilton in New Zealand. Wearing graduation robe and the hat with smile on my face. The most beautiful smile ever. Nervously waiting since last night for today, and I greet the morning with song and breakfast. What a gorgeous morning, I bet.

But no. I am not in New Zealand. I am not wearing any robe with hat. Im not greet the morning with breakfast. However I still wear my smile this morning. My hopeful fake smile. The smile that people always ask me to wear. The smile that everyone say will make my face look sweet. The smile that makes me approachable. That smile. I wear that. And I thought it helps me on hiding my thoughts well.

5 years of engineering. It goes back to when I was form 4. My addmath teacher told me about MRSM overseas programme and I decided straight away to go into that programme. I saw that opportunity to go out from Malaysia and have an experience that can't be taken or replaced by anything else. I worked on my english, taking advantage of my skillfull ex-boyfriend to improve my writing and speaking (while still loving him dearly), and aim for that programme.

One of the reasons I chose engineering was only that moment engineering will give me the chance to go overseas in a shortest time. A year in foundation and another in Unikl. 2 years and Im out. It was a great planning. I pushed myself to like physic although my true call is mathematic. Physic was disaster for me. Biology and chemistry were hell so nothing related to that. Few months of hard work, I applied for the programme.

My trial result wasn't so bad so I got interviewed. And again with the help of my dear ex, we did my interview essay and practiced on the session. I put a life motto in there just to show my charm and they did ask me about that which I successfully told them. So it didn't look like Im bluffing tho I was.  Who got time for life motto at the age of 17? Oh! I am! haha

After few weeks (maybe) I received letter saying I got into the programme and will start foundation on January the next year. It was overwhelming. I was extremely happy. Nothing was happier than the thought of going out of Malaysia. My dream will finally come true.

Staying out on the sun, play on the beach on summer, go to concert and eat a lot of western food as much as I can were my bucket list. I did everything. The experience in New Zealand feels like a dream and I still feel the same. A dream.

Thank you to:

  • Ms Samiyah, Mr Sholikhin, Mr Farid, Mr Eizzat, Ms Syuhada
  • Mak, K Siti
  • Teacher Nazila, Teacher Wani
  • 5 Leeds classmates
  • Ms Elena, Ms Nadhrah
  • K Hanan, K Didi, K Naza, K Andi, K Ila, K Rina, K Susan, K Han, K Fid, K Shelly, K Fariza, K Jijah
  • Kakak Auckland
  • Zhong, Jeeraj, Wei Jei
  • Lombok, Fikri, Tun

5 years of engineering wasn't tough or was it? I am not regret of my decision to enjoy my university life. I decided that grade was only a measure of my academic performance but I am more than that. My ability and skills are way more than As' or Bs'. 

I met a lot of people. New Zealand turned me from someone who is timid to more outspoken, from a non-english speaker to well speaking english, from a kid to a girl and to a lady. I fall in love with New Zealand the moment I step out from the plane. Everything is beautiful. Everything is paradise. Everything is love. New Zealand makes me dream other than just living overseas, it makes me dream of achieving more in life. 

New Zealand brought me to wonderful late night walks, meaningful stargazing, hiking dates, scrumptious eggs benedict with salmon, hype concerts, lovely weekend events, beautiful sunrise, sweet rain, cold wind, warm-hearted coffee, lengthy spontaneous conversations, emotional dreams, gorgeous clear water beaches and endless memories. I would marry New Zealand if it is a man. A man of dreams. A man of my dream. 

And with that I think, only New Zealand can heal me. 
. . .
This should be about graduation but I miss New Zealand too much. Alhamdulillah for 3 years of fantastic years. Keep strong Yasmin. You are not there yet! You have another two final things to achieve. Professional Engineer and Professional Engineer with Practicing Certificate. That is the ultimate of your engineering achievement. Believe in yourself. Have faith in Allah, the best Planner. 

You need to feel desperate, be desperate to achieve your goal so that you will work extra hours, walk extra miles and everything is for you. Refocus your life. Although your heart is on your sleeves, be extra of yourself. You can Yasmin. You always do. 

Thanks Yasmin.
I love you Yasmin.

No comments:

Post a Comment